Since I started blogging I’m very proud of the way I have managed to feel my way around things and get a grip on other things. I’ve been feeling around in the dark and learning the power of swapping favours and saying the right things at the right time … you know I’m talking about my wordpress blog, right?
Ok, there’s been a little feeling other things in the dark but that’s for a totally different converstation. Today it’s about the little things in life that are frustrating the hell out of me.
Here’s a reminder that I’m not in the positivity movement and don’t have to pretend that everything in life is peachy just in case I attract something negative while uttering my truth. I’m also not into thinking that speaking the frustrations makes me a miserable person. If anything, I admit my truths and do something about them!
How did this all come about? Well it’s a toss up between the “A” falling off of my keyboard this morning and it wobbling around while I type right now and the annoying call I keep getting from a certain guy who thinks sweeping things under the carpet works for me.
But most of all … it’s the SNL I can’t get rid of on my freaking blog. You can see it, right? It’s glaringly obvious, just under the Tweet button and it’s been there ever since I loaded the newest Facebook plugin. Don’t tell me to remove it because it took me ages to find a button that actually did what I want to do. Don’t tell me to get someone to help because I’m slowly learning that, no matter how much someone loves or cares about you, it’s always a mission to do that one little thing. Don’t tell me to pay someone because right now, it would have to go to the other kind of SNL as a payment exchange.
It’s always those little things that I end up wasting precious time over. So I’m annoyed. I’m annoyed that A’s pop off, SNL’s don’t go away and that friends and boys don’t think.
Friends don’t think that the only thing anyone wants is truth. Ok, all that I want is the truth. I don’t care about many other qualities besides that truth because my most valued asset is the power to choose and it’s impossible to choose from a lie.
The oldest line in the book is: “I didn’t want to hurt you!” The only thing that ever hurts someone is knowing that a friend lied to them. The truth does something different … it gives everyone the option to decide if they want to be hurt or not. So my friend kept something from me because he said he knew it would hurt me. It did hurt me but hearing via the grapevine pissed me off.
I’m this girl who truly doesn’t get the point of not just saying the truth. There really is no other option but what you really think or really mean … is there? Am I that naive?
You don’t even have to sit there and think it’s so easy for me because every day I fight things that could truly perpetuate lies. I’m tempted by someone who is in a relationship and that would make for another real SNL scenario, but this is always my benchmark in my life. If I can’t tell my best friend … and now, if I can’t blog about it, them I’m out of my integrity. Yes, I could tell my best friend that I was having an affair and we could both rationalise it that I’m single so I’m not the once cheating … but the bottom line for me is truth. If I can’t tell the truth at a party or I have to keep a secret in case the truth leaks out, then I just don’t do it. Oh … so I think I’ve spoken about boys and friends here.
Don’t lie to me and don’t make me lie … it’s as simple as that! And when I carry that around with me while trying to get A’s back on keyboards and SNL’s off wordpress blogs … well then the littlest thing just pisses me off!
PS … loving my day! Loving the sunshine on a winter morning! Loving me! Loving you! … So don’t anyone tell me to fix my attitude or think positive thoughts … ok? Good … seriously, I do love you!
With courage, consciousness & a sense of humour